Recently, I went to Five & Below the store and found the book The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Riz. I was actually quite shocked and told myself maybe this is a sign I should finally read it. Yes, I know shocking I haven’t read it since I am such an enthusiast of self-help books. My mom and one of my closest friends loved reading it. However, I wasn’t ready to read it for some strange reason. Well guess what?! That evening when I got home from Five & Below I told myself I was going to read it and sure enough I read the whole thing! If you have not read the book please don’t read this blog , because I will mention some information and quotes from the book. Otherwise, read on and enjoy my personal overview.
The introduction for me was everything, and if I am being quite honest sometimes I overlook them since I find them dull. However, the title “The Smokey Mirror” got my attention and so I read it…” three thousand years ago, there was a human just like you and me…” . Talk about an introduction what a way to get someone attention or is just me? So of course I kept reading and when I read:
“Everything is made of light”, he said, “and the space in-between isn’t empty”. And he knew that everything that exists is one living being, and that light is the messenger of life, because it is alive and contains all information.
The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Riz
What a beautiful read with just that quote above, this quote can symbolize many things such as energy or even God . When I read it I thought about energy and how we are all connected into one. You can read this quote and think about something else, that is the beauty of words.
The First Agreement: Be Impeccable with your Word
This was such an amazing agreement to read , because boy is this true! We learn about society , religion, beliefs, and so much more at such a young age. But we mostly learn it from our parents that learned it from their parent and their family. The cycle is vicious and sometimes we never break it, therefore we must unlearn many things in order to fully plant a new seed for the next generation. Society as whole does not help either. I remember when I started community college and studied humanity this is when I kept questioning the “norms” of society. According to Don Miguel Ruiz , ” A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself”. this is something I understood completely because, Gabby Bernstein has always mention the idea of forgiving yourself. Just like Ruiz talks about not blaming yourself or even judging yourself for the actions you take. I personally always thought I was ugly and felt meanless all throughout my life until my late teenage years. My boyfriend at the time made me realize I was in fact worth it and beautiful. I am forever grateful for that, because I unlearned all words and action from my past ( that I told myself and from the bullies in my life) , because of his gentle and loving words. Now, I know my self worth because I learned to love myself through other self practices and rituals.
For years we have received the gossips and spells from the words of others,but also from the way we use our word with ourselves.
pg 42 The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Riz
The Second Agreement: Don’t Take Anything Personally
Boy is this something that takes practice ! It took me awhile to learn that people reflect their insecurities on you. Does it still hurt? Yes, sometime I do still take things personal but I remind myself to relax and reflect on what was said at that moment. However, for the most part I understand that the person talking to me might still be dealing with unhealed wounds from their past or still dealing with things in the moment. During the pandemic I did a lot of self healing work that this agreement is something that is still on going practice, but I do know my worth therefore I am much stronger than before. I have almost become immune to certain things said to me.
Third Agreement- Don’t make assumptions
I felt so attack reading this agreement! I think this is something I do a lot , I make assumptions or ideas in my head that are not real. I am still living in this “dream” like the movie “The Truman Show” when it comes to certain things in my life. Some of them is due to me not speaking up or not taking action. However, this chapter also made me realize I don’t have a fear of driving. I just simply feel I don’t need to drive, if I was put in a situation where I had to do it I actually would do all the steps. It is something I made up in my head so I wouldn’t have to drive. See I had lived in New York since I was young and always took the subways or buses. Maybe now that that mindset might change and I will feel like I want/need to drive. Therefore, Ruiz mentions for this agreement to ask questions which I know I don’t do a lot , because I know I jump to conclusion about things. We also assume that the people we love “should” know how we are which later causes conflict when they don’t do what “you” thought they “should have done”. Due to this we build a poison in our relationship, because now there is unsolved issue because there was assumptions being made.
The Fourth Agreement: Always do your best
My favorite agreement , because at the end of it all that is all we can do is do our best. Noone is perfect, but maybe in their eyes they are or someone else might think they are. We must continue to learn and grow!
Do not be concerned about the future; keep your attention on today, and stay in the present moment.Just live one day at a time. Always do your best to keep these agreements, and soon it will be easy for you.Today is the beginning of a new dream.
pg 91 The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Riz
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